Stranger things....

**Observation of the day:  The amount of crazy people with whom I have contact is directly proportionate to the amount of prescription drug coverage my insurance provides.  God brings me all the crazy people because it only costs me $15 a month in anti-depressants and high blood pressure medicine.**

"Well I'm bipolar and havent taken my meds in a month or so.  I keep thinking of killing my sister."
"I'm bipolar and right now I can't quit crying so I think you should take me home."
"I'm bipolar...that's why I pick convicts to get me pregnant.  All my baby daddies are in prison."
"I'm bipolar, that's why I had sex with a midget and he got me pregnant."
"Well, I tried to kill myself this one time by jumping out of the window.  Didn't work.  I'm okay now, I just cut myself."
(All by different students)

"Well I flunked 3 class, big deal. Why don't I still get my grant money? WHAT? The government doesn't pay us to fail? WTF is wrong with you people?"

"Well, I need to go to Vegas to get married so I need my stifend."

"So you mean I have to payfor my books?"

"I was withdrawn from school because I just quit coming.  When do I get my next stifend check?"

AND MY ALL TIME FAVORITE:

"Hey...you know you want some of dis! Come over miz patti and get some!"