Happy New Year!
It's been a long time since I've blogged. Today is a day that has me reflecting and thinking, so a blog post is in order.
What I've learned in the last year:
1. Falling in love is the easy part. Love is actually not enough to sustain a relationship. Communication and mutual respect is vital to a happy marriage or relationship. Every day requires a lot of work -- and when someone tells you, "Love shouldn't be hard or shouldn't require work" -- I call BS. Love is hard and does require work.
2. You cannot make someone happy. You cannot help/change someone who is intent on being unhappy or living in emotional chaos. You can vote with your feet and either stay around to live in chaos with them or you can exit stage left. Just because someone is "family" by genetics or marriage doesn't mean you should allow them to blacken your life.
3. My heart is capable of loving a lot of people. I never used to understand when people said, "I love you" to their friends. I finally get it. I really get it.
4. The ability to open your mind and grasp a new concept or a lifestyle vastly different from your own is available to all thinking human beings. Some choose to be narrow minded and judgemental.
5. Complaining about something doesn't change it. We all need to vent our frustrations but constantly hyper focusing on them leads to continued negative thinking and bias against everything.
6. There is a difference between supporting someone whether it be moral support or financial support and enabling. Enabling is no bueno.
7. Sometimes, being a hardass gets old. In my job, I have to be a hardass 85% of the time. At home, I have to be a hardass 85% of the time. I love the 15% of the time I get to be soft and fluffy. I know the 85% of the hardass time serves its purpose because my children are becoming self-sufficient and accountable. They have goals that they will achieve on their own -- not because I was a hovering parent who made things happen for them. I'm not going to live forever thus I can't fix everything for them. I must give them the tools to navigate this life on their own.
8. Treat people well. Really. A smile. A kind word. A simple touch on the arm. A simple, "How are you?" can make someone's day. Go out of your way to just be nice a few times a day. You would be amazed at how kindness breeds good will.
Enjoy 2013!!!
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Monday, November 14, 2011
I forgot I had a blog....
I've been thinking about my blog a lot lately. I sort of forgot I had one. But I really need to write on it today.
Today, I spent quite a lot of time and energy trying to help Sabrina get an IEP at school. I made multiple phone calls, was at the high school at 6:45 a.m., ordered 5 different books, made more phone calls, reached out to multiple sources seeking information and help. And you know what I see today as I check on Sabrina's facebook? A note from her Aunt (her mother's sister) saying how she wishes Sabrina's mother was alive so she could kick my ass. Really? Yep, because I'm that awful person that has busted my butt for 2 years trying to help a child that is not mine be as normal as possible. Yep, that is just horrible. I'm the person who set up the Facebook so that Vickey's family would have a way to communicate with Sabrina and so Sabrina could be a normal teen. So why would you write that crap where a 14 year girl is going to read it? Seriously?
Sigh....this on a day when I feel just exhausted. I'm overwhelmed with work and teaching and kids. Trying to make sure I'm not neglecting my own child while I'm so wrapped up into helping Sabrina. Trying to make sure I'm completely ignoring Amanda just because she is older and needs less of my attention.
You know, there are days where I just wanna say, "Have at it folks....if ya'all think you can do better, go for it." But you know, these are the same people that were in these kids' life the whole time and didn't do a damned thing other than cause misery and pain. So I guess I'm okay...just frustrated.
Today, I spent quite a lot of time and energy trying to help Sabrina get an IEP at school. I made multiple phone calls, was at the high school at 6:45 a.m., ordered 5 different books, made more phone calls, reached out to multiple sources seeking information and help. And you know what I see today as I check on Sabrina's facebook? A note from her Aunt (her mother's sister) saying how she wishes Sabrina's mother was alive so she could kick my ass. Really? Yep, because I'm that awful person that has busted my butt for 2 years trying to help a child that is not mine be as normal as possible. Yep, that is just horrible. I'm the person who set up the Facebook so that Vickey's family would have a way to communicate with Sabrina and so Sabrina could be a normal teen. So why would you write that crap where a 14 year girl is going to read it? Seriously?
Sigh....this on a day when I feel just exhausted. I'm overwhelmed with work and teaching and kids. Trying to make sure I'm not neglecting my own child while I'm so wrapped up into helping Sabrina. Trying to make sure I'm completely ignoring Amanda just because she is older and needs less of my attention.
You know, there are days where I just wanna say, "Have at it folks....if ya'all think you can do better, go for it." But you know, these are the same people that were in these kids' life the whole time and didn't do a damned thing other than cause misery and pain. So I guess I'm okay...just frustrated.
Monday, August 22, 2011
Stranger things....
**Observation of the day: The amount of crazy people with whom I have contact is directly proportionate to the amount of prescription drug coverage my insurance provides. God brings me all the crazy people because it only costs me $15 a month in anti-depressants and high blood pressure medicine.**
"Well I'm bipolar and havent taken my meds in a month or so. I keep thinking of killing my sister."
"I'm bipolar and right now I can't quit crying so I think you should take me home."
"I'm bipolar...that's why I pick convicts to get me pregnant. All my baby daddies are in prison."
"I'm bipolar, that's why I had sex with a midget and he got me pregnant."
"Well, I tried to kill myself this one time by jumping out of the window. Didn't work. I'm okay now, I just cut myself."
(All by different students)
"Well I flunked 3 class, big deal. Why don't I still get my grant money? WHAT? The government doesn't pay us to fail? WTF is wrong with you people?"
"Well, I need to go to Vegas to get married so I need my stifend."
"So you mean I have to payfor my books?"
"I was withdrawn from school because I just quit coming. When do I get my next stifend check?"
AND MY ALL TIME FAVORITE:
"Hey...you know you want some of dis! Come over miz patti and get some!"
"Well I'm bipolar and havent taken my meds in a month or so. I keep thinking of killing my sister."
"I'm bipolar and right now I can't quit crying so I think you should take me home."
"I'm bipolar...that's why I pick convicts to get me pregnant. All my baby daddies are in prison."
"I'm bipolar, that's why I had sex with a midget and he got me pregnant."
"Well, I tried to kill myself this one time by jumping out of the window. Didn't work. I'm okay now, I just cut myself."
(All by different students)
"Well I flunked 3 class, big deal. Why don't I still get my grant money? WHAT? The government doesn't pay us to fail? WTF is wrong with you people?"
"Well, I need to go to Vegas to get married so I need my stifend."
"So you mean I have to payfor my books?"
"I was withdrawn from school because I just quit coming. When do I get my next stifend check?"
AND MY ALL TIME FAVORITE:
"Hey...you know you want some of dis! Come over miz patti and get some!"
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Heard at work.....
"Should I use the school's address for my home address or my home address as my home address for my FAFSA?"
"I didn't get loans. I got financial aid. It's all free. I don't have to pay anything back.'
"Obama said I go to school for free."
"I need stifend money to pay my boof rent."
"Well, I cheated on my husband with another student. My husband followed me to school and caught me making out with my new boyfriend in the parking lot."
"Well I cheated on my wife with another student. Now my wife won't give me my stepon, so you need to give me some more."
"Can I still get my stevon money if I withdraw from school?"
"Well I use my kids' social security to live on. Since that is going to end soon, Ima go to school to get paid."
The things heard in the financial aid office......
"I didn't get loans. I got financial aid. It's all free. I don't have to pay anything back.'
"Obama said I go to school for free."
"I need stifend money to pay my boof rent."
"Well, I cheated on my husband with another student. My husband followed me to school and caught me making out with my new boyfriend in the parking lot."
"Well I cheated on my wife with another student. Now my wife won't give me my stepon, so you need to give me some more."
"Can I still get my stevon money if I withdraw from school?"
"Well I use my kids' social security to live on. Since that is going to end soon, Ima go to school to get paid."
The things heard in the financial aid office......
Monday, July 18, 2011
Kicking an addiction...
I'm yet again attempting to stop smoking. I've been on Wellbutrin again for the last two weeks. I smoked my last cigarette tonight with a little fanfare. I'm ready to stop. I really am. I just don't want to gain any weight. I went to a "Back on the Bandwagon" seminar with just 5 of us with Dr. Simpson. I'm trying to get back on track there as well. Hopefully all of it together will be good.
We went to see Harry Potter tonight. It was very well done and I enjoyed the movie. Sorry to see it end but sort of glad at the same time. Those "poor" kids need to do something different with their lives.
**Edit....(continued on Monday)
I suck. I smoked today. At about 9:30 a.m. I felt the urge to reach across my desk and choke someone. I smoked. Sigh.
I'm thinking quitting smoking, cutting out Sweet N Low, Diet Coke and Maple goodies is probably not a good idea all at once. Especially this week.
Why do I like to fall asleep watching TV? I mean, I really, really like it. It makes me happy. I really wish the TV had a timer tough so I wouldn't wake up to the TV. Ya know? I want to go to sleep with it but don't want it to wake me up. Ahhh...one day, my pretty, one day.
I've been reading a website devoted to women dating a widower for quite sometime. Now there's a Facebook group. I joined. It's for women dating, married to or otherwise involved with a widower. Very interesting. The overall consensus seems to be that the late wife's family is the source of most problems. Go figure.
This weekend Bob changed his FB status to "Married" -- and then I confirmed it. We didn't get married. But he did it to amuse himself with his former in-laws reading it and having a coronary. Some people need to get a life.
We went to see Harry Potter tonight. It was very well done and I enjoyed the movie. Sorry to see it end but sort of glad at the same time. Those "poor" kids need to do something different with their lives.
**Edit....(continued on Monday)
I suck. I smoked today. At about 9:30 a.m. I felt the urge to reach across my desk and choke someone. I smoked. Sigh.
I'm thinking quitting smoking, cutting out Sweet N Low, Diet Coke and Maple goodies is probably not a good idea all at once. Especially this week.
Why do I like to fall asleep watching TV? I mean, I really, really like it. It makes me happy. I really wish the TV had a timer tough so I wouldn't wake up to the TV. Ya know? I want to go to sleep with it but don't want it to wake me up. Ahhh...one day, my pretty, one day.
I've been reading a website devoted to women dating a widower for quite sometime. Now there's a Facebook group. I joined. It's for women dating, married to or otherwise involved with a widower. Very interesting. The overall consensus seems to be that the late wife's family is the source of most problems. Go figure.
This weekend Bob changed his FB status to "Married" -- and then I confirmed it. We didn't get married. But he did it to amuse himself with his former in-laws reading it and having a coronary. Some people need to get a life.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Strange things....
I'm preparing for the next class I'm teaching. Of course, I haven't taught it before and I don't have access to the book yet; so I decide to check out the last few instructors' syllabi to see how they structured the class. Interesting. One instructor is a prosecuting attorning for Maricopa County. One is a dance instructor...huh? One has 3 Master's degrees and lists her dogs on her syllabus as her kids and even includes their weights. Well alrighty then.
I only have on Master's degree. What a loser.
I'm afraid to list the dogs on my syllabus. RJ is such a good boy someone would try to steal him. Would so!!
Speaking of RJ...I totally missed my dog this last weekend while we were out of town. I missed the girls too, but I was having serious issues with missing my boy.
I wonder if I'm the only person that owns 25 pairs of shoes, of which half of them hurt my feet? And yet I keep them all because I wear them to work. When my feet hurt I become crabby. And my feet hurt in anything other than a tennis shoe or a Birkenstock sandal. So yeah, my feet hurt every day I go to work.
I only have on Master's degree. What a loser.
I'm afraid to list the dogs on my syllabus. RJ is such a good boy someone would try to steal him. Would so!!
Speaking of RJ...I totally missed my dog this last weekend while we were out of town. I missed the girls too, but I was having serious issues with missing my boy.
I wonder if I'm the only person that owns 25 pairs of shoes, of which half of them hurt my feet? And yet I keep them all because I wear them to work. When my feet hurt I become crabby. And my feet hurt in anything other than a tennis shoe or a Birkenstock sandal. So yeah, my feet hurt every day I go to work.
Monday, June 6, 2011
Taking the high road isn't easy on this one,...
Really? Wow. This is on Bob's former mother-in-law's facebook. Starla was Vickey's friend whose son at one point was dating Amanda. And in Starla's moronic mind, she and Bob would get together and they could be one big happy incestuous family. Apparently I'm the devil reincarnated because I got in the way of that dream.
There's more ugly posts about me as well. I guess that means I'm as fascinating as I always thought I was.
There's more ugly posts about me as well. I guess that means I'm as fascinating as I always thought I was.
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