I've been thinking about my blog a lot lately. I sort of forgot I had one. But I really need to write on it today.
Today, I spent quite a lot of time and energy trying to help Sabrina get an IEP at school. I made multiple phone calls, was at the high school at 6:45 a.m., ordered 5 different books, made more phone calls, reached out to multiple sources seeking information and help. And you know what I see today as I check on Sabrina's facebook? A note from her Aunt (her mother's sister) saying how she wishes Sabrina's mother was alive so she could kick my ass. Really? Yep, because I'm that awful person that has busted my butt for 2 years trying to help a child that is not mine be as normal as possible. Yep, that is just horrible. I'm the person who set up the Facebook so that Vickey's family would have a way to communicate with Sabrina and so Sabrina could be a normal teen. So why would you write that crap where a 14 year girl is going to read it? Seriously?
Sigh....this on a day when I feel just exhausted. I'm overwhelmed with work and teaching and kids. Trying to make sure I'm not neglecting my own child while I'm so wrapped up into helping Sabrina. Trying to make sure I'm completely ignoring Amanda just because she is older and needs less of my attention.
You know, there are days where I just wanna say, "Have at it folks....if ya'all think you can do better, go for it." But you know, these are the same people that were in these kids' life the whole time and didn't do a damned thing other than cause misery and pain. So I guess I'm okay...just frustrated.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Monday, August 22, 2011
Stranger things....
**Observation of the day: The amount of crazy people with whom I have contact is directly proportionate to the amount of prescription drug coverage my insurance provides. God brings me all the crazy people because it only costs me $15 a month in anti-depressants and high blood pressure medicine.**
"Well I'm bipolar and havent taken my meds in a month or so. I keep thinking of killing my sister."
"I'm bipolar and right now I can't quit crying so I think you should take me home."
"I'm bipolar...that's why I pick convicts to get me pregnant. All my baby daddies are in prison."
"I'm bipolar, that's why I had sex with a midget and he got me pregnant."
"Well, I tried to kill myself this one time by jumping out of the window. Didn't work. I'm okay now, I just cut myself."
(All by different students)
"Well I flunked 3 class, big deal. Why don't I still get my grant money? WHAT? The government doesn't pay us to fail? WTF is wrong with you people?"
"Well, I need to go to Vegas to get married so I need my stifend."
"So you mean I have to payfor my books?"
"I was withdrawn from school because I just quit coming. When do I get my next stifend check?"
AND MY ALL TIME FAVORITE:
"Hey...you know you want some of dis! Come over miz patti and get some!"
"Well I'm bipolar and havent taken my meds in a month or so. I keep thinking of killing my sister."
"I'm bipolar and right now I can't quit crying so I think you should take me home."
"I'm bipolar...that's why I pick convicts to get me pregnant. All my baby daddies are in prison."
"I'm bipolar, that's why I had sex with a midget and he got me pregnant."
"Well, I tried to kill myself this one time by jumping out of the window. Didn't work. I'm okay now, I just cut myself."
(All by different students)
"Well I flunked 3 class, big deal. Why don't I still get my grant money? WHAT? The government doesn't pay us to fail? WTF is wrong with you people?"
"Well, I need to go to Vegas to get married so I need my stifend."
"So you mean I have to payfor my books?"
"I was withdrawn from school because I just quit coming. When do I get my next stifend check?"
AND MY ALL TIME FAVORITE:
"Hey...you know you want some of dis! Come over miz patti and get some!"
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Heard at work.....
"Should I use the school's address for my home address or my home address as my home address for my FAFSA?"
"I didn't get loans. I got financial aid. It's all free. I don't have to pay anything back.'
"Obama said I go to school for free."
"I need stifend money to pay my boof rent."
"Well, I cheated on my husband with another student. My husband followed me to school and caught me making out with my new boyfriend in the parking lot."
"Well I cheated on my wife with another student. Now my wife won't give me my stepon, so you need to give me some more."
"Can I still get my stevon money if I withdraw from school?"
"Well I use my kids' social security to live on. Since that is going to end soon, Ima go to school to get paid."
The things heard in the financial aid office......
"I didn't get loans. I got financial aid. It's all free. I don't have to pay anything back.'
"Obama said I go to school for free."
"I need stifend money to pay my boof rent."
"Well, I cheated on my husband with another student. My husband followed me to school and caught me making out with my new boyfriend in the parking lot."
"Well I cheated on my wife with another student. Now my wife won't give me my stepon, so you need to give me some more."
"Can I still get my stevon money if I withdraw from school?"
"Well I use my kids' social security to live on. Since that is going to end soon, Ima go to school to get paid."
The things heard in the financial aid office......
Monday, July 18, 2011
Kicking an addiction...
I'm yet again attempting to stop smoking. I've been on Wellbutrin again for the last two weeks. I smoked my last cigarette tonight with a little fanfare. I'm ready to stop. I really am. I just don't want to gain any weight. I went to a "Back on the Bandwagon" seminar with just 5 of us with Dr. Simpson. I'm trying to get back on track there as well. Hopefully all of it together will be good.
We went to see Harry Potter tonight. It was very well done and I enjoyed the movie. Sorry to see it end but sort of glad at the same time. Those "poor" kids need to do something different with their lives.
**Edit....(continued on Monday)
I suck. I smoked today. At about 9:30 a.m. I felt the urge to reach across my desk and choke someone. I smoked. Sigh.
I'm thinking quitting smoking, cutting out Sweet N Low, Diet Coke and Maple goodies is probably not a good idea all at once. Especially this week.
Why do I like to fall asleep watching TV? I mean, I really, really like it. It makes me happy. I really wish the TV had a timer tough so I wouldn't wake up to the TV. Ya know? I want to go to sleep with it but don't want it to wake me up. Ahhh...one day, my pretty, one day.
I've been reading a website devoted to women dating a widower for quite sometime. Now there's a Facebook group. I joined. It's for women dating, married to or otherwise involved with a widower. Very interesting. The overall consensus seems to be that the late wife's family is the source of most problems. Go figure.
This weekend Bob changed his FB status to "Married" -- and then I confirmed it. We didn't get married. But he did it to amuse himself with his former in-laws reading it and having a coronary. Some people need to get a life.
We went to see Harry Potter tonight. It was very well done and I enjoyed the movie. Sorry to see it end but sort of glad at the same time. Those "poor" kids need to do something different with their lives.
**Edit....(continued on Monday)
I suck. I smoked today. At about 9:30 a.m. I felt the urge to reach across my desk and choke someone. I smoked. Sigh.
I'm thinking quitting smoking, cutting out Sweet N Low, Diet Coke and Maple goodies is probably not a good idea all at once. Especially this week.
Why do I like to fall asleep watching TV? I mean, I really, really like it. It makes me happy. I really wish the TV had a timer tough so I wouldn't wake up to the TV. Ya know? I want to go to sleep with it but don't want it to wake me up. Ahhh...one day, my pretty, one day.
I've been reading a website devoted to women dating a widower for quite sometime. Now there's a Facebook group. I joined. It's for women dating, married to or otherwise involved with a widower. Very interesting. The overall consensus seems to be that the late wife's family is the source of most problems. Go figure.
This weekend Bob changed his FB status to "Married" -- and then I confirmed it. We didn't get married. But he did it to amuse himself with his former in-laws reading it and having a coronary. Some people need to get a life.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Strange things....
I'm preparing for the next class I'm teaching. Of course, I haven't taught it before and I don't have access to the book yet; so I decide to check out the last few instructors' syllabi to see how they structured the class. Interesting. One instructor is a prosecuting attorning for Maricopa County. One is a dance instructor...huh? One has 3 Master's degrees and lists her dogs on her syllabus as her kids and even includes their weights. Well alrighty then.
I only have on Master's degree. What a loser.
I'm afraid to list the dogs on my syllabus. RJ is such a good boy someone would try to steal him. Would so!!
Speaking of RJ...I totally missed my dog this last weekend while we were out of town. I missed the girls too, but I was having serious issues with missing my boy.
I wonder if I'm the only person that owns 25 pairs of shoes, of which half of them hurt my feet? And yet I keep them all because I wear them to work. When my feet hurt I become crabby. And my feet hurt in anything other than a tennis shoe or a Birkenstock sandal. So yeah, my feet hurt every day I go to work.
I only have on Master's degree. What a loser.
I'm afraid to list the dogs on my syllabus. RJ is such a good boy someone would try to steal him. Would so!!
Speaking of RJ...I totally missed my dog this last weekend while we were out of town. I missed the girls too, but I was having serious issues with missing my boy.
I wonder if I'm the only person that owns 25 pairs of shoes, of which half of them hurt my feet? And yet I keep them all because I wear them to work. When my feet hurt I become crabby. And my feet hurt in anything other than a tennis shoe or a Birkenstock sandal. So yeah, my feet hurt every day I go to work.
Monday, June 6, 2011
Taking the high road isn't easy on this one,...
Really? Wow. This is on Bob's former mother-in-law's facebook. Starla was Vickey's friend whose son at one point was dating Amanda. And in Starla's moronic mind, she and Bob would get together and they could be one big happy incestuous family. Apparently I'm the devil reincarnated because I got in the way of that dream.
There's more ugly posts about me as well. I guess that means I'm as fascinating as I always thought I was.
There's more ugly posts about me as well. I guess that means I'm as fascinating as I always thought I was.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Evolution
The older I get, the less I care about a lot of things.
I remember growing up being poor and thinking it was a sign of being "not poor" by spending money unnecessarily and acting like it was no big deal. See....that made me not be poor. Having money to spend.
We grew up in a house that seriously needed painting. We were the poor kids at school. And really, we weren't poor as much as our parents didn't want to spend any money on us kids. If it weren't for my uncles, I would never have had clothes or shoes for school. My mom really should never had children. I was always embarrassed, especially when it rained because our poor house really looked shabby then.
As soon as I was able, I started working. From that point on, I paid for everything for myself. I paid my own insurance, bought my own clothes, paid for the upkeep on my vehicle...everything. And sometimes, I spent money that I shouldn't have trying to prove I wasn't that poor white trash girl from Amity Road.
I always fought that as an adult. I always worried that people were looking down on me because I was poor. I fought hard to get off of Amity Road. But it wasn't until I had Nick that I really wrapped my head around what life really was about. Because in reality, it wasn't about me. It was about my son.
I went back to school. I went to school for 11 years at night to earn my degree. And dang...I was proud. I bought a house. I was making good money. I spent a lot of money. I built a pool in my backyard. Remodeled my house. I was flying high....poor white trash from Amity Road made good.
And then slowly, life intervened in my ego trip. Some really ugly things have come down in the last few years. I've lost my house, which in truth, is my dream house in a lot of ways. Mostly because it was my dream. I'm financially ruined -- I've lost a lot.
But you know what? It's okay. It's money. I'll make more.
I'm healthy. I have a good family. I have good friends. Not lots of them, but the people I count as friends are true friends.
My son is healthy. And he's a damned good kid. He isn't perfect. But he's Nick. He's respectful and tries to be helpful. He has a strong moral compass. He will be a strong young man that is a leader.
That's what life is about. What we leave behind....not what we spend massive amounts of time earning money so we can collect things.
Today, all three kids were gone and it was just Bob and I. I was studying for my certification test and he was farting around in the garage. Periodically, he would come in just to kiss me. I made him lunch and took him iced tea, and snuck a kiss. We didn't talk much, but we didn't need to.
Bob is trying to sort through some of the stuff in the garage and continues to work on merging our belongings. It's absolutely amazing the amount of material items we both have. We could probably fill a Wal-Mart corner store's shelves with stuff. A lot of good stuff, but nevertheless its stuff.
At the end of the day, it isn't any of that stuff that makes me happy. I miss my house, but I love living with Bob. I miss my pool, but I love having pizza and watching a movie with my family. I miss the status symbol of owning my own home, but I love going to bed with a man that rubs my back and tells me he loves me, even spelling it out so I understand.
Evolution. It's a wonderous thing.
I remember growing up being poor and thinking it was a sign of being "not poor" by spending money unnecessarily and acting like it was no big deal. See....that made me not be poor. Having money to spend.
We grew up in a house that seriously needed painting. We were the poor kids at school. And really, we weren't poor as much as our parents didn't want to spend any money on us kids. If it weren't for my uncles, I would never have had clothes or shoes for school. My mom really should never had children. I was always embarrassed, especially when it rained because our poor house really looked shabby then.
As soon as I was able, I started working. From that point on, I paid for everything for myself. I paid my own insurance, bought my own clothes, paid for the upkeep on my vehicle...everything. And sometimes, I spent money that I shouldn't have trying to prove I wasn't that poor white trash girl from Amity Road.
I always fought that as an adult. I always worried that people were looking down on me because I was poor. I fought hard to get off of Amity Road. But it wasn't until I had Nick that I really wrapped my head around what life really was about. Because in reality, it wasn't about me. It was about my son.
I went back to school. I went to school for 11 years at night to earn my degree. And dang...I was proud. I bought a house. I was making good money. I spent a lot of money. I built a pool in my backyard. Remodeled my house. I was flying high....poor white trash from Amity Road made good.
And then slowly, life intervened in my ego trip. Some really ugly things have come down in the last few years. I've lost my house, which in truth, is my dream house in a lot of ways. Mostly because it was my dream. I'm financially ruined -- I've lost a lot.
But you know what? It's okay. It's money. I'll make more.
I'm healthy. I have a good family. I have good friends. Not lots of them, but the people I count as friends are true friends.
My son is healthy. And he's a damned good kid. He isn't perfect. But he's Nick. He's respectful and tries to be helpful. He has a strong moral compass. He will be a strong young man that is a leader.
That's what life is about. What we leave behind....not what we spend massive amounts of time earning money so we can collect things.
Today, all three kids were gone and it was just Bob and I. I was studying for my certification test and he was farting around in the garage. Periodically, he would come in just to kiss me. I made him lunch and took him iced tea, and snuck a kiss. We didn't talk much, but we didn't need to.
Bob is trying to sort through some of the stuff in the garage and continues to work on merging our belongings. It's absolutely amazing the amount of material items we both have. We could probably fill a Wal-Mart corner store's shelves with stuff. A lot of good stuff, but nevertheless its stuff.
At the end of the day, it isn't any of that stuff that makes me happy. I miss my house, but I love living with Bob. I miss my pool, but I love having pizza and watching a movie with my family. I miss the status symbol of owning my own home, but I love going to bed with a man that rubs my back and tells me he loves me, even spelling it out so I understand.
Evolution. It's a wonderous thing.
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Stress, overload and remedies
I'm seriously considering going on a "household items" spending freeze until we use everything here. Today when I looked above the washer/dryer I saw:
1 giant bottle of dishsoap (the brother of the one under the sink
1 giant bottle of Lysol all purpose cleaner (the sister of the one under the sink)
2 giant bottles of fabric softener
2 giant bottles of Tide
3 boxes of Swiffers
And then I pulled the drawers out from under the washer and dryer. Both giant drawers are full.
See the trend? Shopping at Costco = GIANT everything. Everywhere.
I'm actually the one that buys such GIANT things because I hate running out of stuff.
However, today I'm feeling overwhelmed with it. Probably because the last of my belongings have been moved and the garage is incredibly full.. Which leads me to feeling overwhelmed. With stuff.j
Bob begs me to quit buying food and supplies constantly. The large amount of stuff is driving him nuts as well.
My desk at work is starting to remind me of our garage. Ickiness.
Moving on...
We are only going to counseling once a month now. I think we are in a good place. There are still days that I get frustrated but for the most part we are able to talk things through. Truly, the biggest problem of late seems to be lack of time. On Monday, I got home at 6:30ish. Tuesday it was 7:30ish. Wednesday 10ish and Thursday 10:30ish. Well...that means Bob is in bed. And we don't usually talk during the day. On Wednesdays we usually talk on my way to teach my class.
The kids seem to have adjusted to their routine and all seems amazingly normal.
1 giant bottle of dishsoap (the brother of the one under the sink
1 giant bottle of Lysol all purpose cleaner (the sister of the one under the sink)
2 giant bottles of fabric softener
2 giant bottles of Tide
3 boxes of Swiffers
And then I pulled the drawers out from under the washer and dryer. Both giant drawers are full.
See the trend? Shopping at Costco = GIANT everything. Everywhere.
I'm actually the one that buys such GIANT things because I hate running out of stuff.
However, today I'm feeling overwhelmed with it. Probably because the last of my belongings have been moved and the garage is incredibly full.. Which leads me to feeling overwhelmed. With stuff.j
Bob begs me to quit buying food and supplies constantly. The large amount of stuff is driving him nuts as well.
My desk at work is starting to remind me of our garage. Ickiness.
Moving on...
We are only going to counseling once a month now. I think we are in a good place. There are still days that I get frustrated but for the most part we are able to talk things through. Truly, the biggest problem of late seems to be lack of time. On Monday, I got home at 6:30ish. Tuesday it was 7:30ish. Wednesday 10ish and Thursday 10:30ish. Well...that means Bob is in bed. And we don't usually talk during the day. On Wednesdays we usually talk on my way to teach my class.
The kids seem to have adjusted to their routine and all seems amazingly normal.
Monday, May 16, 2011
Huh?
Two women I went to high school with have lost their husbands this year. That makes me very sad. And makes me want to take better care of my health. Another woman I went to high school with is dying of cancer. She has 7 kids.
It really actually scares the eebie jeebies out of me. I suppose as we continue to age, it's going to happen.
It's 11:41 p.m. I'm wide awake. I've been taking blood pressure medicine that seemed to be helping me get to sleep. No luck tonight. I think I'm brain just won't turn off.
Friday, we met with the high school guidance counselor and the elementary school staff for Sabrina's IEP. Gulp. Public education is scary. And it truly is no wonder so many kids in Arizona are getting through the school system completely uneducated. The assistant principal was there and my impression of her was that she was a complete moron -- and an unprepared moron at that. Sabrina's teacher left a lot to be desired. Luckily, and unluckily for me, I'm very accustomed to having very hard conversations with people because of my job. I let her be stupid for a little while and then I very nicely made her feel like an ass. It's a gift.
I can't believe in a few days my son will be a junior in high school. Holy canoli...where has the time gone? Seems like yesterday I was singing Lion King songs to him and dancing around in the livingroom. Or he was putting band-aids on all of his fingers and was roaring at everyone. The kid didn't talk but boy could he roar at everyone. I think he really thought he was Lion King.
This last weekend, Bob took the kids camping along with my dad and my brother. Some other friends went as well. I stayed home for a quiet, chore filled weekend. It's great that they can all go and get along. They really seem to enjoy each other's company. And it's great experience for Nick and Sabrina both. Sabrina was the only girl that went but she loved every minute of it.
Speaking of Sabrina...can someone explain to me the snotty teenaged girl attitude? The last two days, she has been a little snot box. If this is how things are going to be for a few years, I definitely need to pray for some more patience. My son learned very quickly to not throw attitude with me. I don't know that I know how to handle the girl snotty routine. I'm going to have to be very creative with discipline.
It really actually scares the eebie jeebies out of me. I suppose as we continue to age, it's going to happen.
It's 11:41 p.m. I'm wide awake. I've been taking blood pressure medicine that seemed to be helping me get to sleep. No luck tonight. I think I'm brain just won't turn off.
Friday, we met with the high school guidance counselor and the elementary school staff for Sabrina's IEP. Gulp. Public education is scary. And it truly is no wonder so many kids in Arizona are getting through the school system completely uneducated. The assistant principal was there and my impression of her was that she was a complete moron -- and an unprepared moron at that. Sabrina's teacher left a lot to be desired. Luckily, and unluckily for me, I'm very accustomed to having very hard conversations with people because of my job. I let her be stupid for a little while and then I very nicely made her feel like an ass. It's a gift.
I can't believe in a few days my son will be a junior in high school. Holy canoli...where has the time gone? Seems like yesterday I was singing Lion King songs to him and dancing around in the livingroom. Or he was putting band-aids on all of his fingers and was roaring at everyone. The kid didn't talk but boy could he roar at everyone. I think he really thought he was Lion King.
This last weekend, Bob took the kids camping along with my dad and my brother. Some other friends went as well. I stayed home for a quiet, chore filled weekend. It's great that they can all go and get along. They really seem to enjoy each other's company. And it's great experience for Nick and Sabrina both. Sabrina was the only girl that went but she loved every minute of it.
Speaking of Sabrina...can someone explain to me the snotty teenaged girl attitude? The last two days, she has been a little snot box. If this is how things are going to be for a few years, I definitely need to pray for some more patience. My son learned very quickly to not throw attitude with me. I don't know that I know how to handle the girl snotty routine. I'm going to have to be very creative with discipline.
Monday, May 9, 2011
That didn't take long
Our marriage counselor told us tonight that we probably didn't need to come back for a month or so.
Go figure. Three sessions and we are fixed.
Well, we aren't fixed but we are sure a lot better.
I asked Bob tonight what he learned. His response? "I learned I'm always right and you are always wrong." Dude.
But that's sort of the way it has gone. Not completely but the counselor made it very clear that sometimes my expectations aren't necessarily fair.
I do a good job of being my own advocate and confronting issues head on. But my expectation that Bob would speak up on my behalf when people are not being pleasant to me, isn't necessarily fair. Bob is responsive when I bring it up but I do have to bring it up. She said this is fair. It would be disrespectful if he wasn't reponsive to my request. So....okay. It's that "Can't read your mind thing."
All in all, I learned we do more right than wrong.
We communicate well (now). We show each other a lot of consideration and respect. We have a high level of trust.
I've learned to back up and let him process. He's slower than I am.
I've learned to wait for him and not jump in when he pauses.
I've learned that we process things very differently and that's okay.
He's learned to talk. Seriously. He did. He is talking more and more. Speaking to the counselor about some things seems to have broken something loose in him.
He's learned that he loves the stability that I bring to his life. He loves my family. He loves that we are able to talk things through.
And today, when we finished up...laughing at each other, it made me love him even more.
For a man that refused to go to counseling, that counseling was a joke, he really stepped up and participated fully.
Go figure. Three sessions and we are fixed.
Well, we aren't fixed but we are sure a lot better.
I asked Bob tonight what he learned. His response? "I learned I'm always right and you are always wrong." Dude.
But that's sort of the way it has gone. Not completely but the counselor made it very clear that sometimes my expectations aren't necessarily fair.
I do a good job of being my own advocate and confronting issues head on. But my expectation that Bob would speak up on my behalf when people are not being pleasant to me, isn't necessarily fair. Bob is responsive when I bring it up but I do have to bring it up. She said this is fair. It would be disrespectful if he wasn't reponsive to my request. So....okay. It's that "Can't read your mind thing."
All in all, I learned we do more right than wrong.
We communicate well (now). We show each other a lot of consideration and respect. We have a high level of trust.
I've learned to back up and let him process. He's slower than I am.
I've learned to wait for him and not jump in when he pauses.
I've learned that we process things very differently and that's okay.
He's learned to talk. Seriously. He did. He is talking more and more. Speaking to the counselor about some things seems to have broken something loose in him.
He's learned that he loves the stability that I bring to his life. He loves my family. He loves that we are able to talk things through.
And today, when we finished up...laughing at each other, it made me love him even more.
For a man that refused to go to counseling, that counseling was a joke, he really stepped up and participated fully.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
What I've learned from couple's counseling so far:
We do more right than we do wrong. I suppose that's a plus.
Marriage even a pseudo-marriage requires an awful lot of work.
Marriage, even a pseudo-marriage is nothing like anything you or I have ever read in a romance novel. The day to day is just not fantastic.
As the counselor was asking what our normal routine was, we both finally looked at each other and smirked. Yep, we are very boring. Work, home, dinner, bed. Rinse. Repeat.
I've personally learned that I must back off. I know, it's a shock....I have to let Bob find his way at his speed. Conversely, he needs to learn to step up. It isn't my responsibility to do all of the parenting.
We have one major sticking point that we must continue to work through but I anticipate that we won't need to keep going to counseling for very much longer. I figure a few more weeks and then probably some check ups every now and again.
Our sticking point is being addressed, I hope. That sticking point is larger than both of us combined I'm afraid and requires further outside help. But the boundaries are being set by us with clear consequences also be set forth. You can't make someone want to be a part of a larger entity. But we can do our best that they don't destroy the larger entity.
Marriage even a pseudo-marriage requires an awful lot of work.
Marriage, even a pseudo-marriage is nothing like anything you or I have ever read in a romance novel. The day to day is just not fantastic.
As the counselor was asking what our normal routine was, we both finally looked at each other and smirked. Yep, we are very boring. Work, home, dinner, bed. Rinse. Repeat.
I've personally learned that I must back off. I know, it's a shock....I have to let Bob find his way at his speed. Conversely, he needs to learn to step up. It isn't my responsibility to do all of the parenting.
We have one major sticking point that we must continue to work through but I anticipate that we won't need to keep going to counseling for very much longer. I figure a few more weeks and then probably some check ups every now and again.
Our sticking point is being addressed, I hope. That sticking point is larger than both of us combined I'm afraid and requires further outside help. But the boundaries are being set by us with clear consequences also be set forth. You can't make someone want to be a part of a larger entity. But we can do our best that they don't destroy the larger entity.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
I'm fairly certain.....
That every morning, I would happily use a taser to zap the people at QT that are obviously too stupid to get a freaking drink. And to the lady from this morning that was talking on her cell phone (in Spanish) while her little boy tortured the rest of us, and blocked access to the machine....yeah, you are an idiot. And your kid is ugly.
That if I looked like Angelina Jolie with my brains I would be hot and smart but probably not in any different place.
That snipey, petty people irritate the hell of me and make me dream walls/foreheads/and the two meeting.
That there are definitely days that I feel overwhelmed and exhausted. And I just want to run and hide in New Zealand.
That parents that don't take care of their children need to be punched. Hard. Seriously hard. Grow up. Be an adult and be responsible.
That if I have one more student be a pain in my butt this week I'll....well it is inevitable that a student will be a pain in my butt this week; name of the game.
That if I looked like Angelina Jolie with my brains I would be hot and smart but probably not in any different place.
That snipey, petty people irritate the hell of me and make me dream walls/foreheads/and the two meeting.
That there are definitely days that I feel overwhelmed and exhausted. And I just want to run and hide in New Zealand.
That parents that don't take care of their children need to be punched. Hard. Seriously hard. Grow up. Be an adult and be responsible.
That if I have one more student be a pain in my butt this week I'll....well it is inevitable that a student will be a pain in my butt this week; name of the game.
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Oh Major Foul
Again, I've written several posts and haven't posted them.
I promise myself that I shall finish this one in its entirety prior to going to bed.
Nevermind that it is 12:15 a.m. on Saturday and I have to be at work at 9 a.m. I was dog tired at 9 p.m. tonight and of course now I have a 2nd wind and can't sleep.
I've updated Facebook. Graded some papers. Watched NCIS. Went to Wal Mart.
Dude...at Wal Mart I committed a major foul. My sister and I were checking out, she was in front of me. We had an incredibly long wait, by the way, because someone two people in front of us was using WIC and the cashier didn't know how to use the coupons. So after waiting quite some time, we moved lines. I digress....so our items are at the front of the line when I notice there is a two teenagers in front of us, one a boy and one a girl. So I, thinking I'm being ever polite, say, "Don't start ringing up the stuff on the belt. He has something in his hand." The cashier looks, holds out his hand to receive said package. The large box of condoms to which I have drawn everyone's attention. We all know my voice carries. A lot.
Poor kids. DOH!!
I was on vacation last week. My first vacation in quite some time. I loved every minute of it. I didn't get squat done but I did get to spend some time with some people I have missed. I had a different lunch date every day of the week.
We took Sabrina to the Melmed Center in Scottsdale to receive a final diagnosis. She was diagnosed as being "High Functioning Aspergers." What this means for us is WHEW! Seriously. Now we know. She isn't deliberately being difficult. She isn't deliberately different. She is just Sabrina. And now we know how to get her some help so that she can function in society. She will be in a transitional class to go into high school which should help ease her into mainstream high school.
It will require a lot of time, attention and money but it will be of great benefit to her in the long run.
I'm still struggling quite a lot with Bob's family, Vickey's family and friends. I've tried to have conversations with the different parties, only to find out that as usual, I said too much in my attempt to forge a connection. I didn't say anything out of line, but I apparently gave the interested parties too much ammunition and it appears two of the women (MEOW!) were only befriending me so they could talk about me.
1. Uhhh if you are still talking about me, me and Bob...18 months later, odds are you need to find a hobby.
2. Uhhh if you are still talking about me, me and Bob...18 months later, odds are you really need to get the hell over it and move on.
I mean seriously? At some point, grow up and let go.
I had a long conversation with Bob's sister while on vacation. I left feeling like it was a good conversation and we made a connection. I guess we shall see how it plays out.
I am certain that I'm done trying. I'm doing the best I can and I'm really done worrying and trying.
I also know that tonight as I was loading the pictures from Bob's siter's wedding, and I was editing a picture of Bob....an overwhelming feeling started to well up in my chest. The love I have for the man is strong. And as I sit here looking at him while he's snoring, and I brush his hair from his forehead, tears well up in my eyes because I just adore him.
And sometimes I cry because I just don't know if we will make it. There are so many obstacles. And most days, it just feels like its too much. Somedays, I get frustrated beyond belief over his passiveness, his unwillingness to deal with things, our different parenting styles, our different styles of dealing with just about anything....I could go on.
Since I promised a post and it is now 1 a.m., I'm going to bed. More next time.
I promise myself that I shall finish this one in its entirety prior to going to bed.
Nevermind that it is 12:15 a.m. on Saturday and I have to be at work at 9 a.m. I was dog tired at 9 p.m. tonight and of course now I have a 2nd wind and can't sleep.
I've updated Facebook. Graded some papers. Watched NCIS. Went to Wal Mart.
Dude...at Wal Mart I committed a major foul. My sister and I were checking out, she was in front of me. We had an incredibly long wait, by the way, because someone two people in front of us was using WIC and the cashier didn't know how to use the coupons. So after waiting quite some time, we moved lines. I digress....so our items are at the front of the line when I notice there is a two teenagers in front of us, one a boy and one a girl. So I, thinking I'm being ever polite, say, "Don't start ringing up the stuff on the belt. He has something in his hand." The cashier looks, holds out his hand to receive said package. The large box of condoms to which I have drawn everyone's attention. We all know my voice carries. A lot.
Poor kids. DOH!!
I was on vacation last week. My first vacation in quite some time. I loved every minute of it. I didn't get squat done but I did get to spend some time with some people I have missed. I had a different lunch date every day of the week.
We took Sabrina to the Melmed Center in Scottsdale to receive a final diagnosis. She was diagnosed as being "High Functioning Aspergers." What this means for us is WHEW! Seriously. Now we know. She isn't deliberately being difficult. She isn't deliberately different. She is just Sabrina. And now we know how to get her some help so that she can function in society. She will be in a transitional class to go into high school which should help ease her into mainstream high school.
It will require a lot of time, attention and money but it will be of great benefit to her in the long run.
I'm still struggling quite a lot with Bob's family, Vickey's family and friends. I've tried to have conversations with the different parties, only to find out that as usual, I said too much in my attempt to forge a connection. I didn't say anything out of line, but I apparently gave the interested parties too much ammunition and it appears two of the women (MEOW!) were only befriending me so they could talk about me.
1. Uhhh if you are still talking about me, me and Bob...18 months later, odds are you need to find a hobby.
2. Uhhh if you are still talking about me, me and Bob...18 months later, odds are you really need to get the hell over it and move on.
I mean seriously? At some point, grow up and let go.
I had a long conversation with Bob's sister while on vacation. I left feeling like it was a good conversation and we made a connection. I guess we shall see how it plays out.
I am certain that I'm done trying. I'm doing the best I can and I'm really done worrying and trying.
I also know that tonight as I was loading the pictures from Bob's siter's wedding, and I was editing a picture of Bob....an overwhelming feeling started to well up in my chest. The love I have for the man is strong. And as I sit here looking at him while he's snoring, and I brush his hair from his forehead, tears well up in my eyes because I just adore him.
And sometimes I cry because I just don't know if we will make it. There are so many obstacles. And most days, it just feels like its too much. Somedays, I get frustrated beyond belief over his passiveness, his unwillingness to deal with things, our different parenting styles, our different styles of dealing with just about anything....I could go on.
Since I promised a post and it is now 1 a.m., I'm going to bed. More next time.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Well Jeez Louise
I've started like 6 posts, but then I get tired and go to sleep without finishing them. I just looked. It's more like 8.
Tonight, we had Thanksgiving dinner. Strange I know, but Bob wanted to deep fry a turkey so that's what he did. It's interesting how he only makes the meat, I do all the rest of the work but he gets credit for dinner. I mean seriously...today I made noodles, mashed potatoes and gravy, blueberry muffins, lemon loaves, stuffing, yams, etc. He fried a turkey that took all of 45 minutes. Nevertheless, we had a very pleasant evening. My parents and my brother and his family came over. Baby Hailey started walking.
It's pretty amazing that with one day off a week, I spend that ONE day doing laundry, cleaning, cooking, etc. I actually went grocery shopping yesterday so that chore was at least done. I was on my feet from 9 a.m. until 6 p.m. when we ate dinner. I'm exhausted but my stupid brain just won't shut off.
Random thoughts etc.:
My new favorite saying that I completely made up, "Unless your name is Richard, don't be a dick." LMAO...I crack me up.
I realized today that I don't eat meals anymore. I just snack. I seriously need to get back on track. I will sit down with a plate and have no interest in eating it. But show me a bag of kettle corn and I'm all over it.
I think it's time to start looking for a job. I'm tired of the craziness at my job. And I'm really tired of working all the darned time. I really make 2 dollars an hour.
My son went to get his oil changed today and paid for it on his own. I can't believe he's growing up. He's learning how to maneuver all the grown up stuff and how to avoid getting upsold at the oil change place. Bob and I coached him on what to say etc. but we made him go without one of us.
My car blew up yesterday. What a complete pisser. And it cost a small fortune to get it fixed. Like half as much as what Nick's car cost. Sigh. The car has to last like another 10 years so I guess it's better to take care of it than not. This really cute boy took it and got it washed, oil changed, and got it fixed all while I was at work. I wasn't even home and he got my car taken care of. He's awful cute.
I'm wondering at what point I won't get acne anymore?
And I'm pretty sure I'm occasionally having hot flashes.
Tonight, we had Thanksgiving dinner. Strange I know, but Bob wanted to deep fry a turkey so that's what he did. It's interesting how he only makes the meat, I do all the rest of the work but he gets credit for dinner. I mean seriously...today I made noodles, mashed potatoes and gravy, blueberry muffins, lemon loaves, stuffing, yams, etc. He fried a turkey that took all of 45 minutes. Nevertheless, we had a very pleasant evening. My parents and my brother and his family came over. Baby Hailey started walking.
It's pretty amazing that with one day off a week, I spend that ONE day doing laundry, cleaning, cooking, etc. I actually went grocery shopping yesterday so that chore was at least done. I was on my feet from 9 a.m. until 6 p.m. when we ate dinner. I'm exhausted but my stupid brain just won't shut off.
Random thoughts etc.:
My new favorite saying that I completely made up, "Unless your name is Richard, don't be a dick." LMAO...I crack me up.
I realized today that I don't eat meals anymore. I just snack. I seriously need to get back on track. I will sit down with a plate and have no interest in eating it. But show me a bag of kettle corn and I'm all over it.
I think it's time to start looking for a job. I'm tired of the craziness at my job. And I'm really tired of working all the darned time. I really make 2 dollars an hour.
My son went to get his oil changed today and paid for it on his own. I can't believe he's growing up. He's learning how to maneuver all the grown up stuff and how to avoid getting upsold at the oil change place. Bob and I coached him on what to say etc. but we made him go without one of us.
My car blew up yesterday. What a complete pisser. And it cost a small fortune to get it fixed. Like half as much as what Nick's car cost. Sigh. The car has to last like another 10 years so I guess it's better to take care of it than not. This really cute boy took it and got it washed, oil changed, and got it fixed all while I was at work. I wasn't even home and he got my car taken care of. He's awful cute.
I'm wondering at what point I won't get acne anymore?
And I'm pretty sure I'm occasionally having hot flashes.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Lifelong learner
Today I learned quite a few things.
1. As many times as I have wished to be able to be a stay at home mom, I only want to be a stay at home mom after all of the kids move out.
2. Sometimes, when you've had a rough day you just need to get a pedicure.
3. Just because the women at the nail place keeps asking if you want your lip waxed doesn't mean you have a mustache. But do they like to mess with your head or what?
4. I feel stressed out with all of the "Switch Car Insurance to save..." I mean seriously? What if I'm not saving enough? The choices are overwhelming.
5. I've missed sleeping with my dog. Bob is gone tonight so RJ gets to sleep with momma. Shhhh...it's a secret. We aren't telling Bob.
6. Seeing a light at the end of what has turned out to be an interminable tunnel makes me almost giddy. It's too soon to know that the mess that I've experienced the last 3 years is in fact about to go away, but it is sounding more promising. What it means is that I might actually get to move forward with my life and be a regular person again.
7. I love watching Michael J. Fox on "The Good Wife." He's a neat guy.
8. All of the local news stations in Phoenix are stupid. S.T.U.P.I.D. And they must think the general population is stupid. Wait. Maybe they are. But I'm not and I refuse to watch a show that says, "It's all about you." Dumb.
9. I want to go to law school.
10. After I finish my Ph.D. I start my Ph.D in August. Hopefully. I can finish my Ph.D in 2 years. That means I can start law school by the time I'm 43 or so. I'm going to law school. Seriously.
11. When I told Bob tonight that I wanted to go to law school he merely replied, "I know you do. You always have. And I know you will do it. Do what will make you happy."
12. And number 11 is the reason that I will grow old with that man. He isn't afraid to let me be me. He calls me just to tell me he loves me. And he sends me goofy pictures.
1. As many times as I have wished to be able to be a stay at home mom, I only want to be a stay at home mom after all of the kids move out.
2. Sometimes, when you've had a rough day you just need to get a pedicure.
3. Just because the women at the nail place keeps asking if you want your lip waxed doesn't mean you have a mustache. But do they like to mess with your head or what?
4. I feel stressed out with all of the "Switch Car Insurance to save..." I mean seriously? What if I'm not saving enough? The choices are overwhelming.
5. I've missed sleeping with my dog. Bob is gone tonight so RJ gets to sleep with momma. Shhhh...it's a secret. We aren't telling Bob.
6. Seeing a light at the end of what has turned out to be an interminable tunnel makes me almost giddy. It's too soon to know that the mess that I've experienced the last 3 years is in fact about to go away, but it is sounding more promising. What it means is that I might actually get to move forward with my life and be a regular person again.
7. I love watching Michael J. Fox on "The Good Wife." He's a neat guy.
8. All of the local news stations in Phoenix are stupid. S.T.U.P.I.D. And they must think the general population is stupid. Wait. Maybe they are. But I'm not and I refuse to watch a show that says, "It's all about you." Dumb.
9. I want to go to law school.
10. After I finish my Ph.D. I start my Ph.D in August. Hopefully. I can finish my Ph.D in 2 years. That means I can start law school by the time I'm 43 or so. I'm going to law school. Seriously.
11. When I told Bob tonight that I wanted to go to law school he merely replied, "I know you do. You always have. And I know you will do it. Do what will make you happy."
12. And number 11 is the reason that I will grow old with that man. He isn't afraid to let me be me. He calls me just to tell me he loves me. And he sends me goofy pictures.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Adult-onset of ADD
I'm pretty sure I'm developing ADD as an adult. Well, either that or I've always had weird thought but I pay more attention to them now.
Some strange things I thought today:
This morning as I passed a Starbucks: "I wonder if working at Starbucks, with all the grumpy people waiting to get coffee is a stressful job? I wonder how long I would work at Starbucks before I reach through the window and punch someone in the nose?"
This morning at work: "I wonder how much trouble I would get in I used the 'Jethro Gibbs head slap' at work? I wonder how he gets away with it at work and no one ever reports him to HR? Oh I hope NCIS is on tonight so I have new reruns to watch when I get home. In my next life, I'm going to work for NCIS. Or I'm going to be a cat. A tabby cat."
Sigh. See what I mean?
"If a transsexual woman (used to be a man) is dating a lesbian, is the lesbian really a lesbian or is the transsexual a lesbian transsexual? How is that possible?" -- hey, I saw a transsexual woman with a lesbian, which prompted that musing.
"How in the world, are these students about to finish their college education with the writing skills of a 6th grader? Did I do a horrible job instructing them or is our education system that flawed? Am I being too hard on them? Should I be grading them based on what my capabilities are or what all of their capabilities seem to be?"
"Am I really an asshole? I've heard 4 times in a week how stern I am. Am I really that bad? Or again, is it that my standards of expected behavior is so different?"
"Really? Am I really cut out to be a boss? I hate that I have to babysit grown people. Stupid people just keep pushing and pushing and then want to complain that I'm stern. Jerks."
"I wish I were at smart as Abby."
"I wish I could be a stay at home mom."
Some strange things I thought today:
This morning as I passed a Starbucks: "I wonder if working at Starbucks, with all the grumpy people waiting to get coffee is a stressful job? I wonder how long I would work at Starbucks before I reach through the window and punch someone in the nose?"
This morning at work: "I wonder how much trouble I would get in I used the 'Jethro Gibbs head slap' at work? I wonder how he gets away with it at work and no one ever reports him to HR? Oh I hope NCIS is on tonight so I have new reruns to watch when I get home. In my next life, I'm going to work for NCIS. Or I'm going to be a cat. A tabby cat."
Sigh. See what I mean?
"If a transsexual woman (used to be a man) is dating a lesbian, is the lesbian really a lesbian or is the transsexual a lesbian transsexual? How is that possible?" -- hey, I saw a transsexual woman with a lesbian, which prompted that musing.
"How in the world, are these students about to finish their college education with the writing skills of a 6th grader? Did I do a horrible job instructing them or is our education system that flawed? Am I being too hard on them? Should I be grading them based on what my capabilities are or what all of their capabilities seem to be?"
"Am I really an asshole? I've heard 4 times in a week how stern I am. Am I really that bad? Or again, is it that my standards of expected behavior is so different?"
"Really? Am I really cut out to be a boss? I hate that I have to babysit grown people. Stupid people just keep pushing and pushing and then want to complain that I'm stern. Jerks."
"I wish I were at smart as Abby."
"I wish I could be a stay at home mom."
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
As Good As It Gets
I was having a conversation with a friend the other day; we were pondering the question, "Is this as good as it gets?"
My answer: I don't know. I think I'm at a stage in life where I'm wondering what it is all about. My son is almost grown. For so long, my purpose in life was him. Teaching him. Showing him. Raising him. And now? Now, he is driving and for all intents and purposes, he is independent. Granted, he relies on me for gas money until he gets a job but he makes good decisions. I'm done, except for the policing part.
So what's left? Is this when I finally get to do what I want? And wow...what is it that I want to be when I grow up? My friend is in her 50s and is still asking herself that question.
I guess it's time to get my 5 year plan paper out of my wallet and take another gander at it. And for the first time in my 40 year history, I will be making these plans with a partner. Ugh. I think in the adjustment phase of our relationship, this is what I struggle with the most. Actually having to consult someone else instead of it just being my way. It's a new thing for me.
In other less philosophical news: the newest tasing subject. AHA! Yep, I've been pretty lenient in my tasing desires. But alas, someone has earned my tasing attention. And actually what I decided for this person was that he needed to be beaten with a stupid stick. Because he just needs the stupid beaten out of him. Seriously, when you are so stupid that stupid people look at you and think, "Dude is stupid!" -- you are stupid. When I have to tell you the answer to your question no less than 8 times -- not because you didn't hear me, but because you refuse to believe the answer, you are stupid. When you insist on taking the question higher than me because again you don't believe the answer, you are stupid. And when the higher than me gives you the same answer and you continue to argue, you are stupid. I wonder if stupid knows how much of my time he wasted yesterday being stupid? Sigh. The really sad this is...he has bred. Yep, there are little stupids out there. Poor things.
My answer: I don't know. I think I'm at a stage in life where I'm wondering what it is all about. My son is almost grown. For so long, my purpose in life was him. Teaching him. Showing him. Raising him. And now? Now, he is driving and for all intents and purposes, he is independent. Granted, he relies on me for gas money until he gets a job but he makes good decisions. I'm done, except for the policing part.
So what's left? Is this when I finally get to do what I want? And wow...what is it that I want to be when I grow up? My friend is in her 50s and is still asking herself that question.
I guess it's time to get my 5 year plan paper out of my wallet and take another gander at it. And for the first time in my 40 year history, I will be making these plans with a partner. Ugh. I think in the adjustment phase of our relationship, this is what I struggle with the most. Actually having to consult someone else instead of it just being my way. It's a new thing for me.
In other less philosophical news: the newest tasing subject. AHA! Yep, I've been pretty lenient in my tasing desires. But alas, someone has earned my tasing attention. And actually what I decided for this person was that he needed to be beaten with a stupid stick. Because he just needs the stupid beaten out of him. Seriously, when you are so stupid that stupid people look at you and think, "Dude is stupid!" -- you are stupid. When I have to tell you the answer to your question no less than 8 times -- not because you didn't hear me, but because you refuse to believe the answer, you are stupid. When you insist on taking the question higher than me because again you don't believe the answer, you are stupid. And when the higher than me gives you the same answer and you continue to argue, you are stupid. I wonder if stupid knows how much of my time he wasted yesterday being stupid? Sigh. The really sad this is...he has bred. Yep, there are little stupids out there. Poor things.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Squirrel...Squirrel....Squirrel....
Things learned in the last week:
I'm easily distracted by people, thus when I'm really trying to focus I will turn on music to drown other people out. Otherwise, I'm like the dogs in "Up and Away" who when they heard the word squirrel, they go beserk.
The Shake Weight makes me giggle. Well, really it's what you look like when you are working with it. Because, yes, inside I really am 8 years old. I'm thinking of buying one and walking around the office with it just for my amusement. Hee hee hee...
It's not a good idea to sit on someone to lick their eyeballs when your son wipes boogers on you, which causes you to fall over laughing and then you fart on the person you were sitting on. It grosses them out. And then it makes you laugh harder because now you farted. And then the person whose eyeballs were getting licked is shouting, "The honeymoon is over!" which makes you laugh harder. And fart again. SIGH.
When I sit at an employee's desk and work, it's amazing the reaction I get. Everyone manages to stay on task and conduct their interviews exactly as they are supposed to do. I think I'll be sitting out in the trenches at least a couple of times a week. Maybe I can auction off private time in my office for my staff.
Bob is putting my dog on a diet. I don't like it. I equate happiness with food. It makes my dog happy to eat. This feeding him once a day and no people food is sheer torture. RJ is going to starve to death. He isn't fat. He's big furred.
And the final thing I've learned.....I love giving babies Cheetos because it makes them orange. The best part is sending them home with the orange stuff all over them. Bah ha ha ha!
I'm easily distracted by people, thus when I'm really trying to focus I will turn on music to drown other people out. Otherwise, I'm like the dogs in "Up and Away" who when they heard the word squirrel, they go beserk.
The Shake Weight makes me giggle. Well, really it's what you look like when you are working with it. Because, yes, inside I really am 8 years old. I'm thinking of buying one and walking around the office with it just for my amusement. Hee hee hee...
It's not a good idea to sit on someone to lick their eyeballs when your son wipes boogers on you, which causes you to fall over laughing and then you fart on the person you were sitting on. It grosses them out. And then it makes you laugh harder because now you farted. And then the person whose eyeballs were getting licked is shouting, "The honeymoon is over!" which makes you laugh harder. And fart again. SIGH.
When I sit at an employee's desk and work, it's amazing the reaction I get. Everyone manages to stay on task and conduct their interviews exactly as they are supposed to do. I think I'll be sitting out in the trenches at least a couple of times a week. Maybe I can auction off private time in my office for my staff.
Bob is putting my dog on a diet. I don't like it. I equate happiness with food. It makes my dog happy to eat. This feeding him once a day and no people food is sheer torture. RJ is going to starve to death. He isn't fat. He's big furred.
And the final thing I've learned.....I love giving babies Cheetos because it makes them orange. The best part is sending them home with the orange stuff all over them. Bah ha ha ha!
Monday, January 10, 2011
Big Fat Meanie
I was a big, fat meanie today. I felt it. All. Day. First of all, I didn't feel good. Second of all, I didn't feel good. Third of all...we all know I have the patience of a crack fiend waiting for the next fix. No I didn't just say I was a crack fiend...I said that I don't have a lot of spare "patience" runnin' around. When you are feeling so ugly inside that you can't stand yourself, you know it is going to be a long day. And today was one of those days.
See, I have this problem called EXPECTATIONS. I have a pretty well defined set of expectations regarding acceptable behavior, acceptable amount of initiative being put forth and let's just say an expectation of common courtesy. And I don't care how old you are or who your momma is, you darned well better be nice or you are going to bug me. And for God's sake...seriously? How hard is it to say, "Thank you."? I mean really...I say, "Thank you" regularly because I'm truly thankful. I'm thankful for the dinner that is made. I'm thankful for the QT run. I'm thankful for well just about everything. I'm pretty fed up with the entitlement of some people and lack of saying, "Hey thanks for going out of your way."
On to another channel...my aunt and uncle arrived here today from Kentucky. My uncle is sick and only has a couple of years left so I'm so very grateful to see him. And immediately, Mike and I started to fall right back into our old accent. You know the accent...the "I just left the farm" accent that took years to lose and about two sentences to gain back. Love this: "I reset that darned thing twiced already!" I'll bet I say, "Twiced" a few times tomorrow. I really miss my family in Ohio.
Tase subject of the day: I don't have one today. YIKES. The thought, "Dude needs tased" never occurred to me today. Even as mean as I was. Maybe I should have been my tase subject for being such a little snot.
See, I have this problem called EXPECTATIONS. I have a pretty well defined set of expectations regarding acceptable behavior, acceptable amount of initiative being put forth and let's just say an expectation of common courtesy. And I don't care how old you are or who your momma is, you darned well better be nice or you are going to bug me. And for God's sake...seriously? How hard is it to say, "Thank you."? I mean really...I say, "Thank you" regularly because I'm truly thankful. I'm thankful for the dinner that is made. I'm thankful for the QT run. I'm thankful for well just about everything. I'm pretty fed up with the entitlement of some people and lack of saying, "Hey thanks for going out of your way."
On to another channel...my aunt and uncle arrived here today from Kentucky. My uncle is sick and only has a couple of years left so I'm so very grateful to see him. And immediately, Mike and I started to fall right back into our old accent. You know the accent...the "I just left the farm" accent that took years to lose and about two sentences to gain back. Love this: "I reset that darned thing twiced already!" I'll bet I say, "Twiced" a few times tomorrow. I really miss my family in Ohio.
Tase subject of the day: I don't have one today. YIKES. The thought, "Dude needs tased" never occurred to me today. Even as mean as I was. Maybe I should have been my tase subject for being such a little snot.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Don't Leave your Earplugs around water
Yeah. They soak up the water that mysteriously rolls off the glass...in winter...I get that glasses "sweat" in the summer but not in the winter. But the moral of today's story is if you leave your earplugs on the nightstand and you leave your glass there sweating to the oldies, your earplus will soak up the water and you won't be able to put them in your ears without getting swimmer's ear. And you won't get any sleep. And then you will want to tase someone. See? That's how this works.
I think I'm going to blog every day about the object of my tasing desire for that day. Maybe one day, I will actually go an entire day without having the desire to tase anyone. Ehhhh...maybe in a perfect world.
Today, I had a very long conference call. And at the end of the call, during the wrap up by the ginormous, bignormous boss...two coworkers come in my office and start ranting. "I'm on a call..." "Yeah, but you have to fix this right now!" "I'm on a call, I will deal with you in a few minutes." "NO, you must do this right now." I was so angry I actually had to grit my teeth and then said, "Leave. Now. I'm trying to listen." The offending party came back to apologize and I said, "I wanted to punch you in the head. Don't ever do that again." He/she/they are tase object number 1 and 2 respectively for the day.
At my other job...the teaching job....uhhhh yeah. Last week's assignment was to do an outline for their business plan. A student just re-typed the outline I gave them as an example and turned it in. And then was all offended when I returned his paper with instructions to re-do it. TASE! And then there's the 70 year old Frenchwoman in my class that talks over me and everyone else the entire class period; interrupts everyone and argues constantly. TASE! TASE! TASE! Yeah, that one is mean because she's old but dude...she's rude!
I think I'm going to blog every day about the object of my tasing desire for that day. Maybe one day, I will actually go an entire day without having the desire to tase anyone. Ehhhh...maybe in a perfect world.
Today, I had a very long conference call. And at the end of the call, during the wrap up by the ginormous, bignormous boss...two coworkers come in my office and start ranting. "I'm on a call..." "Yeah, but you have to fix this right now!" "I'm on a call, I will deal with you in a few minutes." "NO, you must do this right now." I was so angry I actually had to grit my teeth and then said, "Leave. Now. I'm trying to listen." The offending party came back to apologize and I said, "I wanted to punch you in the head. Don't ever do that again." He/she/they are tase object number 1 and 2 respectively for the day.
At my other job...the teaching job....uhhhh yeah. Last week's assignment was to do an outline for their business plan. A student just re-typed the outline I gave them as an example and turned it in. And then was all offended when I returned his paper with instructions to re-do it. TASE! And then there's the 70 year old Frenchwoman in my class that talks over me and everyone else the entire class period; interrupts everyone and argues constantly. TASE! TASE! TASE! Yeah, that one is mean because she's old but dude...she's rude!
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
I wish I could trust me with a Taser
I seriously covet a Taser. A pink one. I'll take either one that you shoot or a handheld one. They both have their benefits. Alas, I would definitely use it. And very likely get charged with assault because of said usage. But seriously, some people need Tased. Like the lady this morning at Starbucks who ordered $36 worth of coffee. In. The. Drive-Thru. Seriously? Get your fat butt out of the car and go inside. Quit cogging up the well-oil wheel of the Starbucks Drive-Thru.
I also wanted to Tase the idiot in the bathroom. On her cell phone. Uhhh...really? We don't know how to say, "Hey, let me call you back..." I mean, what if I farted while she was on the phone? That's what happens in the bathroom, you know. Usually not if someone else is in there or at least not without a courtesy flush but sometimes, one squeeks out. The poor person on the other end will hear the echo of my Starbucks fart reverberating through the bathroom. Not cool. Just not cool. It deserves a 3,000 volt jolt.
I actually find myself contemplating my Taser usage. On certain people periodically. Ahhhh....the fantasy. One day my pretty I shall tase you too....Muah ha ha ha ha.
Now that I'm 40. Sigh. Did I really just start a sentence with that phrase? Now that I'm 40. Holy Crap Batman. Ahem.
Now that I'm 40, I'm finding myself more and more inclined to just say things. Not that I was ever really inclined to not speak my mind but I actually told a student yesterday to pull up his pants; that I didn't want to see his underwear any more than he wanted to see mine; and if he didn't pull up his pants NOW I was pulling mine down. Uhhh...I really should have been nicer as I'm in management. And I'm a Director. But the dude had his pants down with no shorts on underneath. Really? I don't get the whole concept but at least put shorts un underneath. He was showing his Hanes. And Michael Jordan he wasn't. The kid looked at me like I was a complete loon and stuttered, "No Ma'am...please don't." That's What I Thought, PUNK.
I also wanted to Tase the idiot in the bathroom. On her cell phone. Uhhh...really? We don't know how to say, "Hey, let me call you back..." I mean, what if I farted while she was on the phone? That's what happens in the bathroom, you know. Usually not if someone else is in there or at least not without a courtesy flush but sometimes, one squeeks out. The poor person on the other end will hear the echo of my Starbucks fart reverberating through the bathroom. Not cool. Just not cool. It deserves a 3,000 volt jolt.
I actually find myself contemplating my Taser usage. On certain people periodically. Ahhhh....the fantasy. One day my pretty I shall tase you too....Muah ha ha ha ha.
Now that I'm 40. Sigh. Did I really just start a sentence with that phrase? Now that I'm 40. Holy Crap Batman. Ahem.
Now that I'm 40, I'm finding myself more and more inclined to just say things. Not that I was ever really inclined to not speak my mind but I actually told a student yesterday to pull up his pants; that I didn't want to see his underwear any more than he wanted to see mine; and if he didn't pull up his pants NOW I was pulling mine down. Uhhh...I really should have been nicer as I'm in management. And I'm a Director. But the dude had his pants down with no shorts on underneath. Really? I don't get the whole concept but at least put shorts un underneath. He was showing his Hanes. And Michael Jordan he wasn't. The kid looked at me like I was a complete loon and stuttered, "No Ma'am...please don't." That's What I Thought, PUNK.
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